I think someone threw all the street signs in the harbor after they were done with the tea
As promised, here is a legitimate update of recent events.
The plan for last night was for me and my friend to drive to Boston, find the theater where the concert would be, park nearby, walk to the theater, enjoy the show, walk back, drive home.
What actually happened was we were a late getting on the road, I missed one bloody sign (or did I just fall victim to a recent sign-stealing crime and miss it because there was not one there?), and pulled over to get directions. The woman was very helpful and wrote stuff out for me. What she could not help me with was the utter lack of signs that would make me feel like I was even remotely in the right area. So I pulled over again and headed back in the exact direction I had come from to get to where I needed to go. So then the haphazard directions which I was then cursing caused me to wind all the way around crazy streets to that this landmark would be on the correct side of us. To make what will be a long story a little shorter, the road we needed to be on magically appeared, I turned around to find parking, we found it, and celebrated. Smoke if you got ‘em. We left at about 6 and it was 8:30 when we left the car.
Then we started walking. We assumed getting directions on foot would be easier than while driving, but we were incorrect. We walked down blocks, doubled back, looped around, asked for directions, went back the way we came, asked again, turned corners, searched for our street signs, asked for directions twice more, and finally found where we needed to be (which was going to be on our right according to the last guy we asked, but it was really on the left). The concert started at 8 and it was 9:30 when we walked in.
The show, at least what we saw of it, was good. Dir en Grey are good performers, so that was a treat. Some ornery skeez with boots that her calves were trying to escape from kept standing in the middle of the aisle with her scraggly-haired boyfriend and appeared to be ready to fight with one of the show staff. I wanted to see that happen. It’s not fucking hard to move back into where you were, you whore. Stop acting like the universe is wronging you. Ps you look like a wad of hamburger balanced on two toothpicks.
The show ended and we left without merch. I said I’d give my brother and his friend (my friend’s ex– kind of awkward) a ride home. Given that we had gone through so much shit to just finally arrive at the theater, it was perfectly understandable that we had a hard time getting to the car. Cut to us finding the car in a location I never would have even guessed to check almost two hours later. I couldn’t have gotten back to the theater from there if I tried.
Luckily, my brother has come into his own as a navigator and we managed to finagle a viable route onto the highway. I cannot drive and work a map at the same time, so I was glad to have him in the backseat soothing me with his confidence and optimism. The drive home was easy enough. I was exhausted and kept driving just to keep us going. I was planning on driving to the video game store and pick up the World of Warcraft expansion, but I missed the exit and even taking the next possible ones every time threw us out way far away. So I said “Fuck you!” and angrily drove back into town to drop off our friends. We got home around 3 and I promptly passed out like an alkie on St. Paddy’s day.
Oh, and you wanna know one of the worst parts of last night? The part that really made me feel like extracting my brain through my anus with a rusty fishing hook?
I had a Katy Perry song stuck in my head almost the whole night.
Tags: aching feet, boston, dir en grey, getting lost, katy perry, street signs