You will find neither chocolate nor graham cracker here
“Write about marshmallows.” That’s what she told me. We were sitting in lawn chairs, squinting and blinking against the smoke from the fire as we made s’mores, and she told me to write about marshmallows. I cocked my head and furrowed my brows. And then I nodded. I told her I could make that work. When it comes to cooking marshmallows, I like mine pretty much charred, with a gooey lump of...
Read MoreI like it neat
Sometimes I think I smell onions. There is almost never an onion in sight when I think I smell them. My first reaction upon encountering this familiar scent is “Yum, onions!” because I am quite fond of that particular root vegetable. My second reaction, which is always very quick in following the first, is “I wonder if that is someone’s body odor.” Because sometimes B.O. is oniony in...
Read MoreYou may not know beauty, but you know what you like (and it’s Edward Cullen)
I hope you’re sitting down. I have some big news. I, your humble tangenteer, have a confession to make. I saw Twilight: Eclipse. And by and large, I thought it was a pretty decent movie. But this post isn’t going to be about why I saw this film or what my critiques of it are (although originally, that’s exactly what this was going to be). This post is going to be about a very...
Read MorePoontang Safari: An anthropological study of mating rituals in the urban Serengeti
Over the past few years, I’ve watched enough NatGeo to know that when it comes to sex, pretty much anything goes. But truth be told, the sex really isn’t what makes things interesting– although seeing a male giraffe trying to mount a female at the zoo was good for a chuckle. It’s more about what goes on before sex. How is it that two individuals wind up in the sack...
Read MorePride Cometh
I’m sure every one of you has heard, whether from time to time or on an annoyingly regular basis, someone referring to someone or something as “gay”. Usually this is said in a tone conveying sarcasm, disrespect, or ignorance in a way that brings to a simmer the blood of any socially-conscious person. However, I feel like I can say– without any fear of admonishment– one thing for...
Read MoreSometimes correlation is enough evidence to prove causation.
When it comes to things that are cyclical in nature, the ones most easily-predicted are, without a doubt, ones that are directly related to the whims of people. There are all sorts of trends that come and go each year, like senioritis, making resolutions, patterns of shopping… the list goes on (although not very far for me since I only had a 1×2 inch scrap of paper to scrawl my notes...
Read MoreAbout Me
I'm cool and I write things that are awesome! and i like to use the word awesome!